Archive for May, 2006

Hope everyone enjoyed the long weekend…

The weather came together nicely for Memorial Day and the 3 day weekend as a whole. Rather than rush out and try to cram a bunch of activities into the weekend we just stayed at home mostly and relaxed. Fired the grill up two out of the three days. Ribs, hamburgers, hotdogs, bratwurst, couldn’t go wrong really. The sod we laid weeks ago has taken nicely, the cooler weather has helped I’m sure. Picked up a few chaise lounges from the thrift store and had a nice time sitting out in the yard with the dogs and a cold beer. The pool is another story however, after battling algae for two weeks the pool store recommended we dump 25 pounds of shock treatment into it! Needless to say the chlorine level was much too high to enjoy it, though it’s a nice bright blue now, instead of green. Sadly, the break in the weather has clearly come to an end and we’re quickly approaching 110 degrees.

Something wicked hot this way comes…

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It is nice this morning, but a look at the five day forecasts depresses me. The heat is coming. I hear Payson is nice this time of year…

We may be rude but we are the safest.

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It is settled. We are complete jerks when we drive, but we are safe jerks. According to the latest Allstate Insurance study Phoenix has the safest drivers in the US. Okay, riddle me this. If we are such safe drivers, why is my car insurance rate so high?

In other news, the Santan Freeway through Gilbert is almost complete. A party is scheduled on the freeway in two weeks, on Wednesday, 7 June 2006 from 6 p.m. to 9 p.m. If you would like to attend or participate (for free) as a vendor drop me a line.

An uncharacteristic day and eve in the Valley

Where to start, with the weather of course. My inflatable pool rafts are gone, likely never to be seen again. Despite my $3.99 loss however, the wind was quite welcome. It kept high temperatures down near 80 today, and it’s almost June! Driving home after work was quite relaxing with the windows down, a reprieve from stale AC. My girlfriend is out for dinner with a friend so what better to do on a cool summer night than to fire up the ol’ Weber grill. Tossed on some hot dogs and cracked a beer, Sam Adams Brown Ale to be exact. After throwing a ball to the dogs for 5 minutes the other dogs are up. Topped with curry ketchup and bbq sauce they’re mighty tasty, and the beer is quite refreshing. Sadly, tomorrow it will all change with the return of 100 degree weather. Hope you enjoyed today while it lasted.

What’s happening in Phoenix?

Is it just me or does it seem like we’ve got more & more crime and morons in the valley. First there’s the Raytheon engineer who quits his job, becomes a meth-head (my speculation), kills his wife less than 1/4 mile from my house, shoots her parents, and is finally caught days later. Next is the speeding mental patient with anger management issues (who coincidentally also looked like a meth-head) that I moderately cut off in Phoenix the other day (I say moderately cut off because he simply had to slow down somewhat when I switched into his lane). This cat then starts driving erratically, gets in front of me, stops his car (I stopped far enough back to blow out of there if need be), opens the door, gets out and starts walking towards my car shaking his fist! Are you kidding me? Time to bust a u-turn, I nearly clipped his knee when I did it, too many crazies in this town I tell you. I was thinking of purchasing a handgun and getting a concealed weapons permit, but maybe I’ll start with a taser, that way if for some reason I find myself becoming a moron I can just shock myself out of it.

PEOPLE, METH IS BAD! If you want to do drugs go smoke some weed or something! It won’t make you kill your wife or shoot nails into your head.

Kudos to the 7 yr old Glendale kid that “escaped” alcatraz by making the swim.

Sitting with random people

That’s one of the things I’ve always loved about Europe, and finally it’s coming here to some restaurants that offer communal tables. I’m really glad to see this, as it will cut down on the strange looks I sometimes get in overcrowded restaurants when I ask a complete stranger if I can sit with them.

You Know You’re From Arizona When…

You’ve signed so many petitions to recall governors you can’t remember the name of the incumbent.

You notice your car overheating before you drive it.

You no longer associate bridges or rivers with water.

You know a swamp cooler is not a happy hour drink.

You can hear the weather forecast of 115 degrees without flinching.

You can be in the snow, then drive for an hour…and it will be over 100 degrees.

You discover, in July it only takes two fingers to drive your car, because your steering wheel is so hot.

You can make sun tea instantly.

You run your a/c in the middle of winter so you can use your fireplace.

The best parking is determined by shade…..not distance.

You realize that “Valley Fever” isn’t a disco dance.

Hotter water comes from the cold water tap than the hot one.

It’s noon in July, kids are on summer vacation and yet all the streets are totally empty of both cars and people.

You actually burn your hand opening the car door.

Sunscreen is sold year round, kept right at the checkout counter.

You put on fresh sunscreen just to go check the mail box.

Some fools will market mini-misters for joggers and some other fools will actually buy them. Worse…..some fools actually try to jog.

You know hot air balloons can’t rise because the air temperature is hotter than the air inside the balloon.

No one would dream of putting vinyl inside a car.

You see two trees fighting over a dog.
You can say “Hohokam” and people don’t think you’re laughing funny

You see more irrigation water on the street than there is in the Salt River

You have to go to a fake beach for some fake waves

You can pronounce”Saguaro”, “Tempe”, “San Xavier”, “Canyon de Chelly”, “Mogollon Rim”, and “Cholla”

You can understand the reason for a town named “Why”

You can fry an egg on the hood of a car IN THE MORNING!

You hear people say “but it’s a DRY heat!”

You buy salsa by the gallon.

Your Christmas decorations include sand and paper bags.

You think a red light is merely a suggestion.

All of your out-of-state friends start to visit after October but clear out come the end of April.

You think someone driving wearing oven mitts is clever.

Most of the restaurants in town have the first name “El” or “Los.”

You think 60 tons of crushed red rock makes a beautiful yard.

Your house is made of stucco and has a red clay tile roof.

Vehicles with open windows have the right-of-way in the summer.

Most homes have more firearms than people.

Kids will ask, “What’s a mosquito?”

People who have black cars or black upholstery in their car are automatically assumed to be from out of-state or nuts.

You know better than to get into a car with leather seats if you’re wearing shorts.

If you haven’t worked for Motorola at some time, you must be a newcomer.

You can finish a Big Gulp in 10 minutes and go back for seconds.

You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Arizona.

Sunblock

One would think I have lived in Phoenix long enough to know that it doesn’t take long to get a sunburn. I went shirtless this Saturday for about an hour from 9:30AM – 10:30AM while laying some sod. Ended up with a beet red back! While not as bad as other sunburns I have had (like the one I got on my shins while watching IRL races @ PIR years back), it still sucks.

547 Bumps Per Hour

Or at least that’s what it feels like. What am I talking about? Pecos Road in Gilbert. I swear that road has been undergoing “improvements” for years now, but nothing ever seems to change on it except that the bumps seem to be multiplying. Well, that and every now and then one of the temporary lane markers gets knocked over or picked up. I suppose I could go and look somewhere to find out exactly WHAT they are supposedly doing to that road, but for now I just want to whine. I cannot WAIT for the 202 to be open further east than Gilbert Road.

Saying goodbye to Robbie.

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Officer Robert Daniel Targosz

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